Where does negativity come from?

I’ve noticed today, as I do most days, that negativity is everywhere. 

Take blogging as an example. I am fully aware that I’m going to be slated for daring to write this. But seriously, who the hell do we think we are? 

I am a (rather passive) member of a few blogging groups on Facebook, where PR’s and companies offer opportunities to bloggers. 

Conversations are also posted about emails that people have had from PR’s who have offered bloggers something which, quite frankly, is deemed offensive. 

I understand the frustration, really I do. I write for a living and I know that we are often asked to work for free, or for next to nothing. Of course I can’t work for nothing, we all have to pay the bills. 

But seriously, sometimes we do need to just stop and take a step back. Yes, companies and PR’s are approaching bloggers and offering them work which just isn’t for them. 

But let’s face it, PR’s have to pay the bills as well. The irrelevant emails might be a bit of an irritation, but you can’t knock them for trying.

And for a new blogger, the chance to get your writing seen and perhaps a small gift, a voucher, a few pounds in payment or the opportunity to win a prize can seem like the most exciting thing in the world. 

Actually, the fact that somebody has asked you to write for them at all is justifiably a source of pride. And then you glance at Facebook. 

And a blogger who you respect and look up to is slating the same opportunity you were so excited about. Do you still accept it, or do you turn it down because of what other people think? 

I love being a parent blogger. And I love working with some amazing brands.

We go on days out that I never went on as a child and quite frankly, I couldn’t regularly afford to take my children on them now if it wasn’t for blogging. 

I get to try new products that I would never even have heard of if I didn’t write a blog.

I never go shopping, I rarely speak to anyone outside of my household and yet occasionally, I own things that other people admire. 

Better still, I get to raise awareness of ethical brands, products and charities in a way that would only usually be available to people with a social life. And quite frankly, I love it. 

And of course, it’s not just blogging. In all walks of life, adults always have something bad to say. Like the silly cow writing this who is droning on other people being negative, whilst being negative herself. 

But my question is, when do we become these people who always see the worst in everything and everyone? 

What happens to the child who views a bike ride, a good television programme, a ride on a rocking horse or a nice big slice of cake as the most exciting thing in the world? 

I know full well that the problem is me.

My children don’t become negative from listening to other people moaning and complaining. I am the person who is with them all day, every day. I am the one who has an inordinate amount of influence on their attitudes and beliefs. 

To teach my children to be positive, I need to start by teaching myself.

So tomorrow, I’m going to stop and think before I start moaning. 

I want my children to continue looking on the bright for side as long as possible, and I know that starts with me. 

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8 Comments

  1. April 1, 2015 / 10:44 pm

    I love this post. I was thinking earlier that I am glad I wasn’t part of blogging groups when I was a new blogger. Now, as an admin of a blogging group I see all sorts.
    I really appreciate the lifestyle we have and blogging is to thank for a big chunk of it x
    Donna recently posted…Bucket List Update – MarchMy Profile

    • monsterid April 1, 2015 / 10:48 pm

      Thank you Donna, I was a bit worried about writing it, I’m waiting for the backlash to be honest but I completely agree with you, we gain so much from blogging and I hate to see how much we bitch about it, myself included. I think it’s good sometimes to take a step back and appreciate what we have.x

    • April 2, 2015 / 9:19 pm

      I think it’s wonderful that you are beginning now while your children are young. My husband and I haven’t been the best examples of positivity over the years and boy does it show now that our children are teens. 🙁

      This is a great post. I enjoyed reading your thoughts and applaud your honest remarks.

      • monsterid April 2, 2015 / 9:27 pm

        Thank you Jessie, I have to admit, there’s still a lot of work to do 😉 I hope that by making myself think more about it I’ll set a better example for the girls.x

  2. April 2, 2015 / 7:43 am

    I really enjoyed this too, first of all I love people with a positive attitude who look on the bright side. It’s something I try and teach my children and whilst I’m no angel I do believe positivity breeds positivity.

    As for the complaining about PRs I have been guilty of doing that myself but only because I feel it’s a bit cheeky to be asked to write something for nothing. Where products are concerned even if they are small in value I always respond politely but don’t take on low value items anymore as it’s simply not worth my time.

    Xx
    Amy recently posted…A letter to my teenage selfMy Profile

    • monsterid April 2, 2015 / 7:50 am

      Thank you Amy. I am guilty of it as well and I agree that it’s cheeky to ask us to do something for nothing. I also rarely do the low value items unless it’s an ethical company, which I do for free. However, I worry that new bloggers who should be genuinely proud to get noticed and asked to review little things will be embarrassed and belittled by the way bloggers bitch about things like that. It’s the sort of thing that makes good writers give up. I am guilty of it as much as anyone but I’m going to try to stop.x

  3. April 7, 2015 / 9:57 pm

    What a great post. I agree. I try to be positive but it is so easy to slip into negativity. I will also try and be more sunny side up too 🙂

    • monsterid April 7, 2015 / 10:02 pm

      Thank you. Me too, I’m the first to slip into being a grumpy sod but I’m doing my best 😉

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