My week has been a product of my own failure to accept my limitations. Which is the story of my life really.
I am aiming to start getting my palm oil free business up and running next month.
In order to get going, I of course have to build up the money to do so.
Being freelance, I’m in the fortunate position to be able to take on more work to build up a financial pot.
Sadly, I was barely coping with the amount I was doing before. So upping my workload has been fairly horrific.
Throw in a weekend away and everything other than work has gone completely out of the window.
I always know when I’ve been taking on too much, because I’m too tired to give the girls the attention they deserve.
Libby in particular suffers, it seems that when you’re three, lack of attention results in a change in behaviour.
I’ve been trying to give Libby a little bit more freedom to make her own decisions – even when they’re clearly not ideal.
I like the idea that she’ll learn why we ask her to do particular things rather than just “because I said so.”
This morning, that was going quite well. We’d been to playgroup, ending up getting there a little bit late because she wanted to carry on playing.
She’d behaved fabulously all morning. Then we came home and half way through lunch, she got up to go to the toilet and decided to play upstairs for about 15 minutes.
I have to admit, I lost my cool with her. I needed to work, we had a viewing on the house and I was totally running out of time.
I gave up on letting her make her own decisions and went upstairs to tell her that if she didn’t come down and eat her lunch she’d have to go straight to bed.
At which point, my sweet, angelic little girl who always behaves so immaculately in public tried to push me down the stairs.
She clearly didn’t realise the implications or how much she could have hurt us both. And the stupid thing is, it was my fault.
She’d been doing so well when I wasn’t getting angry with her, and as soon as I got annoyed, she did too.
What better demonstration that my actions have a knock on effect?
And of course, when Libby was crying and grizzling because she’d been told off, this set Lia off as well.
It’s going to be a long month if I can’t manage to take a deep breath and control my temper.
Luckily, the tears and tantrums (from us all) were short lived.
These two are back on form. And me? I’m thinking about what I’ve done.
With a glass of wine of course.
Here is our Thursday photo #62.